1. |
Blind
05:08
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Sometimes I see your reflection
But I'm not quick enough
Sometimes I feel your hand touching mine
As I sleep at night
As I sleep at night
Try as I do I don't see you
Standing right next to me
My eyes burn with tears and I fear
That I'm losing myself again
Where did you go
Where are you coming from
Why can't I see you
Standing right next to me
The pressure inside I can't take
And I find that I cannot breathe
and I can't breathe
For years I have seeked you
Looking with weary eyes so tired
So very tired
For years I have found nothing but
Emptiness and loneliness inside me
Deep inside me
Sometimes I see your reflection
But I'm not quick enough
Sometimes I feel your hand touching mine
As I sleep at night
As I sleep at night
The longing I feel is too strenuous
Please help me find you
Standing right next to me
I know that you're there, but you're not
there
And I can't take it anymore
I can't take it anymore
I've done all that I can and I'll keep doing
All that I can for you
All I can for you
Someday I'll know what it means to be alive
And I'll find you
Standing right next to me
Standing right next to me
Standing right next to me
Sometimes I see your reflection
But I'm not quick enough
Sometimes I feel your hand touching mine
As I sleep at night
As I sleep at night
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2. |
Torment
04:31
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Seven days I have stood alone
reflecting on all of my actions
And i have seen it all before
but i've not the soul to bear it
And I found pride and I found shame
and it eats me up inside
Torrential rains and I walk on
beyond the edge of the horizon
And there is light and there is dark
and there is nothing inbetween,
and as sure as any other
I will suffer as i've been
And never think about the past
and all the things that had to happen
I once was found but now i'm lost
among a sea of endless faces.
It's all forgotten in the end
and nothing ever truly matters.
Retribution for my sins
and the ones I've not yet done.
Staring at the distant lights
that paint the heavans nightfall
through the anger and the storm
I will wait here ever more.
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3. |
Locked Away
03:48
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There's a wall that stands between us
Something niether one can see
Protection from the world outside
but most of all from me.
Years of torture and deceit
Have made your fortress strong
Maybe all are out to harm you
Just as you are never wrong.
You doubted my intentions
Left me graplling with fear
My words were not sincere enough
For your hardened heart to hear.
Thousand miles may lay between us
May as well be down the hall
You close out all around you
So no one's near at all.
Maybe things were different
Though nothing's changed at all
Now my strength is failing
Can't catch you when you fall
You have no need of me
And set out on your own
When the world comes down around you
You'll find yourself alone.
Years will come in silence
Only memories will remain
Peace will not come easy
A token of disdain
So let your hope be silent
Though there's nothing there at all
Sleep will not come easy
As the rain begins to fall.
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4. |
Frozen
06:29
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So close to giving up,
can't help but wonder why.
On the verge of letting go,
I'm so empty deep inside.
And I am all alone,
no one hears me screaming.
So far away from home,
and I am frozen through.
Yesterday is gone,
tomorrow seems too empty.
Time keeps passing by,
passing me too quickly.
Afraid of what I feel,
afraid of moving forward.
I turn towards the sky,
and watch as it tumbles downward.
All my life to live,
the reasons all escape me.
Lie surrounding lies,
all I know is misery.
[[ Nostalgia literally means the pain from an old wound. It's a twinge in your heart, far more powerful than memory alone.
It takes you to place where we ache to go again,
to a place where we know we were loved. ]]
So close to giving up,
can't help but wonder why.
On the verge of letting go,
I'm so empty deep inside.
And I am all alone,
no one hears me screaming.
So far away from home,
and I am frozen through.
I feel I'm shutting down,
outlook growing cold.
My senses burning out
and finally I go numb.
Afraid of what I feel,
afraid of moving forward.
The heartache and the pain
will bleed me dry again.
So close to giving up,
can't help but wonder why.
On the verge of letting go,
I'm so empty deep inside.
And I am all alone,
no one hears me screaming.
So far away from home,
and I am frozen through.
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5. |
Quicksand Effect
03:16
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And here I am alone once more
The same as many years before
And now I see that what makes me
Is fading rapidly
As soon I'll be right back to the start
With hollow words and a heavy heart
How could any of this be?
I'm fading rapidly
I can feel it slipping away
My precious grasp on reality
My little world and all I see
Is fading rapidly
I never thought it'd end this way
You'll understand it all someday
I won't drag you down with me
I'm fading rapidly
I'm sorry I was ever here
Erase me from your memories
Please don't cry for me
I'm only bleeding
I'm sorry I can't dry your tears
Forget that I existed
It's just too late for me
I'm only bleeding
I write these words for all to hear
But no one seems to care
One last step is left for me
I'm fading rapidly
There's so much that's left to say
As my voice is fading away
I once was blind but now I see
I'm fading rapidly
I'm sorry I was ever here
Erase me from your memories
Please don't cry for me
I'm only bleeding
I'm sorry I can't dry your tears
Forget that I existed
It's just too late for me
I'm only bleeding
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6. |
Perfect Sky
04:53
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The sky's so perfect I could scream
As if I've not woken from this dream
I feel a terror seeping in
Something just beneath the skin
Everything feels wrong
Everything is wrong with me
The stars kept staring back at me
Hiding something I can't see
All these memories flooding back
Filling up the heart I lack
Everything is wrong
Everything feels wrong with me
Such familiar horizon
Comforts me as it always has
A pale glow shall soon wash over
Leading to the home I never had
Everything feels wrong
Everything is wrong with me
A world devoid of inspiration
And I have never felt so weak
I seem to see myself as a failure
The old mirror so oblique
And yet I breathe each day
And yet I breathe each day
As if to prove I am alive
A simple mark of desparation
As I throw my mind away
A fleeting spark of inspiration
Of the words I cannot say
Everything feels wrong
And everything is wrong with me
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7. |
Martyr
03:28
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I've stood here waiting for so long
Waiting for an answer
That will never come
That will never come
Years roll by and nothing changes
I feel so close
And yet so far away
So very far away
Judge me not for what is seen
I'll let what goes unspoken carry me
I'll let it carry me
Years roll by and nothing changes
I feel so close
And yet so far away
So very far away
Should I stand here and wait to see
If the soldier inside
Makes a martyr out of me?
Makes a martyr out of me?
Years roll by and nothing changes
I feel so close
And yet so far away
So very far away
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8. |
Regret
05:59
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I see the world before my eyes
Everything I love always dies
How could I survive
When my life isn't mine
There is a hole in my side
Where my pride used to be
My shattered ego runs and hides
Just for no one to see
I can't remember
There is a place I can't go
A place where nothing moves
And as my heart begins to slow
In the tangled web I wove
I can't remember
I've always known my fate
To spend eternity searching
It seems my love has long since died
Lord knows how hard I've tried
I can't remember
How could I ever live this long
When all I've loved is so far gone
A cruel twist of fate held me on
But soon enough I will be gone
Memories fade, but pain is forever
But I still can't remember
I can't remember
I can't remember
I can't remember
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9. |
Mourn
04:33
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Just one more cigarette
and then I'll move on.
Just one last chance to talk,
and then I'll be gone.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
Each time I close my eyes
I don't want to look away.
Each time I say goodbye
it's all I'm forced to say.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
There's so much left to do.
There's so much left to say.
There's so much left for you.
There's so little left of me.
These broken little words
are all I've left to give.
These fragile little thoughts,
I beg you to forgive.
I'm running out of time,
I'm running out of time.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
Just one last cigarette,
I promise this is it.
I've nothing left to say,
I'll live with this regret.
The time has finally come,
so now I must move on.
Will you ever think of me
when I am gone?
Just don't mourn for me
the way I mourn for you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
You fade away from me,
I fade away from you.
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10. |
Haunted
05:00
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I wear this crown of pain
for all the world to see.
Like a twised badge of honor
for all the world to see.
Like a gentle whisper
my voice will carry on.
The silence drives you mad
as it will when I am gone
Look upon my picture,
can you see me there?
A subtle hint of innocence,
although my heart will tear.
I cant forgive,
no matter what you do.
Though I may be empty,
though my time is through,
I will not release you
from yourself until
your fate has been completed,
your destiny fullfilled.
Though I am not present,
though i have moved on,
I'll be here to remind you
of exactly what you've done.
Do you feel regret?
Have you any guilt?
Your conscience must still haunt you
in the life you have built.
I am not so bitter
as to wish you pain.
Fate can be much crueler
than i could ever hope to explain.
I cant forgive,
no matter what you do.
Though I may be empty,
though my time is through,
I will not release you
from yourself until
your fate has been completed,
your destiny fullfilled.
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11. |
Drowning
06:48
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Lost within myself
reaching out for anyone
yet no one has remained
to see what I've become
another sleepless night
no demons here shall wake me
blinded by reality
I close my eyes
another sleepless night
I feel the world just slipping by
chained to an emptiness
beneath an empty sky
don't believe in me
don't believe in anyone
nothing here is real
nothing here can harm you
don't believe in me
don't believe in anyone
it all comes crashing down
because nothing lasts forever
and so it begins again
a test to bring my world apart
another pointless journey
i must depart
and yet it begins again
despite my need to turn away
I stand my ground here
come what may
don't believe in me
don't believe in anyone
nothing here is real
nothing here can harm you
don't believe in me
don't believe in anything
it all comes crashing down
because nothing lasts forever
Lost within myself
reaching out for anyone
yet no one has remained
to see what I've become
don't believe in me
don't believe in anyone
nothing here is real
nothing here can harm you
don't believe in me
don't believe in anything
it all comes crashing down
because nothing lasts forever
Lost within myself
reaching out for anyone
yet no one has remained
to see what I've become
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12. |
Absence
06:21
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I Stare into the face of my brother
His features have faded into dust
He lies here now, waiting for the darkness
Carrying the hopes and dreams we shared
He stood among the ravaged so courageous
His figure stoic and so brave
Cut down in shrouds of subtle irony
For years I prayed that it had taken me
For reasons I have long since forgotten
I could never bear the thought of an end
Years have passed and still I wonder
If I had been the one, where would he be?
Through suffering and pain I've come to realize
Knowing all that I have survived
Only losses and complete destruction
Can release the demons that grow inside
In the absence of a god
In the absence of belief
I will never let this go
I will never let this sleep
I have fallen in too deep.
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13. |
Mourn (Lost Mix)
04:00
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Just one more cigarette
and then I'll move on
Just one last chance to talk
and then I'll be gone
There's so much left to do
There's so much left to say
Each time I close my eyes
I don't want to look away
Each time I say goodbye
it's all I'm forced to say
There's so much left for you
There's so little left of me
These broken little words
are all I've left to give
These fragile little thoughts
I beg you to forgive
I'm running out of time
I'm running out of time
Just one last cigarette
I promise this is it
I've nothing left to say
I'll live with this regret
You fade away from me
I fade away from you
I fade away from you
The time has finally come
so now I must move on
Will you ever think of me
when I am gone
Just don't mourn for me
the way I mourn for you
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14. |
Quiet Fury
04:00
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[[ I know we've traveled far together, this last distance must necessarily be traveled alone. And if the darkness should have swallowed me, you must never think there was a possibility of some secret intervention, something you might have done. I feel the tethers loose and the prospects darken as I cross to face you and look at you, incomplete - hoping that you will forgive me for not making the rest of the journey with you. ]]
There's a light out in the distance
Shining out for me
Perhaps now I may find solace
And all this was meant to be
I am lost
That may never change
I might someday forgive myself
From that which I am chained
I am lost
And may I not be found
Let what I have left behind
Stay buried in the ground
The light is coming closer
Almost near enough to touch
Though I may be bleeding
It's not yet been too much
I am lost
That may never change
I might someday forgive myself
From that which I am chained
I am lost
But finally heading back
Miles to go before I rest
And the sky is turning black.
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15. |
Apathy
04:08
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Watch me fall
Stare as my figure falls apart
See all the things I've worked for
Be ripped and torn apart
I've never asked for much
And yet you still deny
I live with my regrets
The things I left behind
But yet I stand and face you
I see you face to face
Uncaring eyes regard me
And I see your sweet distaste
Break my will
Release the chains that hold me
Bind me by my fears
Blind the eyes that see me
I've never asked for much
And yet you still deny
I live with my regrets
The things I left behind
But yet I stand and face you
I see you face to face
Uncaring eyes regard me
And I see your sweet distaste
Leave me be
Turn your back and walk away
I shame myself
For all the things I let you do to me
I've never asked for much
And yet you still deny
I live with my regrets
The things I left behind
But yet I stand and face you
I see you face to face
Uncaring eyes regard me
And I see your sweet distaste
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Joshua Hart Huntsville, Alabama
Working in the electronically-isolated world of Huntsville, AL, an area where guitars are a prerequisite be it of the country acoustic or rock electric variety, Joshua Hart is a solo musician creating music that alienates itself from its surroundings with an unexpected combination of introspective lyrics paired with the detached sound of his trusty vocoder, backed by fragile piano melodies. ... more
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