1. |
Forever
03:30
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Forever sorry I could never get myself aligned
It hurts knowing I can't turn back the hands of time
If there was ever anything for you I could do
I should have been the one that was always there for you
I'm not asking for any more of your time
I just need you to hear me apologize
While it may not be important in your life
It's all that I have left to do in mine
I'm ashamed of the solace I'd failed to bring
somehow oblivious while you were still in pain
I still see myself at night when I walked away
Accepting now I had long ago dug this grave
Forever sorry I could never get myself aligned
It hurts knowing I can't turn back the hands of time
If there was ever anything for you I could do
I should have been the one that was always there for you
Apologizing now I know is far too late
but before I go this is all I have to say
Without you my life has never been the same
And I'm truly sorry that it had to end this way
Forever sorry I could never get myself aligned
It hurts knowing I can't turn back the hands of time
If there was ever anything for you I could do
I should have been the one that was always there for you
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2. |
Soothing Regret
04:10
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No matter how far apart
No matter how far apart
No matter how far apart
No matter how far apart
Folding up inside
forced to withdraw from you
I pray you can forgive
these are the last of my dues
Such painful hindsight
echoes in my mind
These unwelcome memories
growing worse with time
Bittersweet nostalgia
return to me now
Wrap me in your arms
and soothe my regret somehow
Please rest assured
at one time I had faith
I could rebuild so pure
a love lost but reclaimed
Refuse these apologies
discard my attempts
to make everything right
as my pride fails me again
See through to my heart
I'm grateful you've come this far
I will see you again
No matter how apart
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3. |
Seizure
04:28
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Just time for one last thought now
one to cherish for eternity
I just think of how I'll miss you
I think of how I miss you
Just time for one last thought now
one to cherish for eternity
I just think of how I'll miss you
I think of how I miss you
In the second that it took for
the glass to fall from my hand
I didn't see all I've done
but rather all I planned
In shards I lie on the floor
overcome helpless convulsing
my eyes close depsite my
strength and the picture fades
Broken vocal chords strain now
but alas don't make a sound
tight fists my fingers clenched and
I feel my lungs cave in
these final rasping words
take from me the last of my breath
know I put up a good fight
not for me but those loved in my life
Since I couldn't make amends
I resolve to try again
if we meet in another world and
you give me one more chance
If not I know your reasons
you let your sympathy for me fade
So I understand and ask last
Don't make the same mistakes I've made
A calming silence seeps in
into and blankets my mind
Feeling raw panic begin
knowing I'm out of time
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4. |
Similarities of Sloan
04:23
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In a world parallel to these
confessions that I've reached
where all outcomes conceived
It heals me to think
There's still a chance for me
though in realm that I cant be
I still hold a place
somewhere out there in your dreams
I see the similarities
in your face and in your eyes
It brings back all we've seen
and it leaves me weak inside
I feel a sense of shame
for still carrying this with me
But it warms my heart
to think that it could've been me
For so long it's been my goal
to rebuild our bridge of souls
To find something that may
restore your faith in me
I want you to believe
all I'd sacrafice to see
I wish to finally bring
this nightmare to it's knees
What seems a lifetime ago
In a healing process gone awry
I see the words you wrote
to me once upon a time
I just can't bare to see
so I turn my eyes from the screen
Your and I's circumstance
bare's too much similarity
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5. |
Devout (Acapella)
02:19
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I've tried to be realistic
in my faithful portrayal of flaws,
but when I write these words
I confuse correlation and cause.
Continued misunderstanding
of why it is I'm found so lost,
and I still can't provide answers
as to why it is nothing is solved.
Devout in this oath,
unmoving I will remain,
to find me once more
beside you again someday.
I'm left embracing a prayer
for another chance on the other side.
All I have reduced to this,
one last loose end to tie.
Pondering what I could have said
had I been given just one more day.
Was there a way to avoid
being left behind in my shame.
Devout in this oath,
unmoving I will remain,
to find me once more
beside you again someday.
I fear my good resolutions
have all come years too late.
Where has everyone else gone,
surely I'm not the one to blame.
Eyes closed on the edge,
with no where left to hide.
And so I remain
here devout in denial.
Devout in this oath,
unmoving I will remain,
to find me once more
beside you again someday.
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6. |
Full Disclosure
04:16
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This is the only way
for me to let you know
all that you mean to me
how far I'm willing to go
Here's unbound honesty
of my lost composure
with these words I give
I offer you full disclosure
Here's all I couldn't say
when we were face to face
you were the world to me
thank you for your being
I've only ever sought
just wanted one thing
to give next to you
your touch of healing
Unknowing of sacrifice
From all those around me
Innocent in the wrath
Of an infamous destiny
Finally my life is full
you can let me go
Because in the end
I know that I was loved
Indifference conquered me
for the world I'd seen
everyone else left aside
All beneath my selfish deeds
Is there not a cure
some way to the truth
to believe you are worth
all the words I promised you
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7. |
Deadend
04:53
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The fragments I have claimed
don't seem to relate
to the life ive tried to build
now years lay in waste.
And so now at the end
I recall everything
It's not past sights that sting
but the hopes I'll never see.
Helplessly in my eyes
the eclipsing of my dreams
left to lie awake at night
crestfallen in disbelief.
So I must take leave of you
and with great sadness too.
Maybe had I thought this through
I'd have more to offer you.
Memories escaping me
better years have faded out
the times worth saving
too far out of sight now.
I look down at my feet
and ask what have I become
I've let myself fade out
behind deadend emotions.
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8. |
Silhouette
04:17
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Could you remember me
before I was this way
the better me that passed
not the person here today
Could you forgive all the
promises I made
Regrets I put us through
As my silhouette slowly fades.
Pen borders to surround
to keep the light outside
Outline the oaths I swore
confine the lies inside
Retrace what there is left
and look for one last time
see the portrait of a man
removed of hope or pride.
Watching our shadows blur
a single person now
I've lost a part of me
I can't be without
I'm afraid my time has come
my will given way
there's nothing left
but my featureless remains.
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9. |
Taken
04:46
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How could you just walk away
from someone with their hand out in need
Do you have some kind of warped belief
that you're not involved in their suffering
You have to be prepared to see
there's more to it than your beliefs
You have to understand
where it is the issue lies
Lifeless in your chest
It's a change that occured inside
Come to embrace others sensitivity
and behold each others humanity
You've built yourself up to be something
that you were never meant to be
I think it's time for me to go
I think it's time for me to see
There's no way of going back
Things will never be the same
You only get so many tries
second chances to start again
I smile knowing yours has come
but for me that time is gone
I thought we'd have more time
for us to look within and find
better versions of ourselves
to stand by each others side
What is there left for me to say
how much time have I given away
to regret that held me at bay
for fear of finding a brighter day
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10. |
Every Day
03:38
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You see the cancerous part of me now
manifested for all to see how
High my ego had climbed up to
just fall down and crash into you
It hurts to breath the words I have to move on
I'm still searching for another way out
I dont want think of tomorrow
I have to find a new escape route
A place where I can re-find my
origin of self and peace of mind
That someday you will see me and
view through the past that I've surpassed being
Guilty of romanticizing the past
trouble with finding a new path
I don't see any of this changing
but there's still hope for what the future see's
There are things that will always be beyond me
I've held on to the thought of you forgiving
like a reward ill never be grasping
I'm powerless to the impending defeat
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11. |
Trifecta Of Loss
04:26
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The tears of nostalgia
burning in my eyes
had I planned for the worst
I'd still have failed to find
This is absolutely crushing
a devastating blow
This trifecta of loss
how could I have ever known
It was too unexpected
I'm sinking fast below
I can't recover from this
there's nothing to come back to
This is irreversible
not a simple heart break
but future years without
the light that guided me
So sign away my life
nothing's like it was before
Take it all away from me
I cant take it any more
It's a daily struggle
everyone else moves on
But I can't find the strength
to break free from these thoughts
How could I have been
so dense and naive
To think there was a way
to overcome insolvency
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12. |
Stand Up For Us
03:49
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Tired of all that reminds
I'm tired of the fight
Ready to give in
to this fate I have resigned
Revisited at the end
I couldn't convince you to stay
I never in all of our time
believed it'd end so abruptly
Distance yourself from ghosts
include all ties that be
Burn them to the ground
and begin anew with me
While allowed to stand in the way
I hear just another day
So far invested in you
but only part of you returns to me
I know what you've been through
but you must stand up for us
I've given all I have
so why cant you sacrafice
It's not impossible to change
to let yourself be free
What is it that you must do
is place your trust in me
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13. |
One Wish
04:10
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If I had just a single wish
I'd rescend all the pain I've caused
turn it around put it back in me
and live down all the shame i've brought
So let me hold it in my heart
this is my last chance to atone
let me take it from your arms
and return it to it's home
It can't be fixed I know
but I've never come so close
As to the moments when you lied
beside me so close
My radius consuming all
growing too fast to control
Ensnared in my cloud of blame
deceived by the billowing shade
In the fallout of my pride
No survivors are left behind
Quarantine to no avail
we're sealed from the inside
Sustenance running scarce
Running out of days to trade
With the thought of a world beyond
the hope for rescue fades
If you would let me choose
I would decide for you
to escape from my world
and cut all your ties loose
My radius consuming all
growing too fast to control
Ensnared in my cloud of blame
deceived by the billowing shade
In the fallout of my pride
No survivors are left behind
Quarantine to no avail
we're sealed from the inside
If I had just a single wish
I'd rescend all the pain I've caused
turn it around put it back in me
and live down all the shame i've brought
So let me hold it in my heart
this is my last chance to atone
let me take it from your arms
and return it to it's home
It can't be fixed I know
but I've never come so close
As to the moments when you lied
beside me so close.
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14. |
Hurt
06:20
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So it's on me to take your pain
and carry it with me every day
But for this I don't complain
cause I know your in a better place
You weren't the only one that hoped for more
I know my words haven't held their strength
And I know that if you were still here now
I wouldn't in any way be the same
Rip it all apart I can't decide
if it's worth it to start over again
Would I ever had worked this hard
had I a premonition of the end
Now I'm scarred in entirely new ways
Another promise passed by yesterday
and I can't help but stand and watch as
more of my promise will die today
And though I feel like there is more to say
I have to find peace and let you fade away
in the future now it is up to me
to prove you were right for believing in me
I know my luck to have shared with me
the time and devotion of a beautiful being
so I summarize the time we spent
as a desperate hope to see you again
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15. |
Seraphina
04:42
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I've stopped wishing to find
what has happened to me
Fallen so far short
of who I thought I could be
And though it hurts my eyes
I admit it's plain to see
you will go much further
without carrying me
I feel the hope once had
the faith you've lost in me
The painter of the portrait
I must concede
It was I who gave up
before it was complete
A better life to share
escaped out of reach
Somehow please awake
this heart that's asleep
Like this I can't move
Please come back for me
I'm sorry for the future
we had always dreamed
What we planned together
I can't alone achieve
I don't know what is left
these words seem so brief
There's nothing you can do
but just let go for me
I feel the hope once had
the faith you've lost in me
The painter of the portrait
I must concede
It was I who gave up
before it was complete
A better life to share
escaped out of reach
Somehow please awake
this heart that's asleep
Like this I can't move
Please come back for me
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16. |
Dependency
04:32
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Past trials in your embrace
without words begin to fade
The first time I felt content
as your hand touched my face
I feel in debt to you
whenever you say my name
Sometimes now I look forward
with a new hope that I have changed
What is it that you want from me
whatever it may be
I already know that it is
something that I can't bring
Now as you console me
I wonder who you are
This authentic comfort and warmth
I've never felt before
Your refusal to believe
somehow you don't see
Just how far I have to go
just how incomplete
Yet you have remained
standing next to me
enduring my facade
so blind in your dreams
The time granted in my life
disappearing without a trace
Why are you investing
so much of your empathy
Your shameless open arms
are frightening to me
Dissecting your every move
always questioning
Over time I feel your grip
around me tightening
and what it is that i fear most
a fragile dependency
Past trials in your embrace
without words begin to fade
The first time I felt content
as your hand touched my face
I feel in debt to you
whenever you say my name
Sometimes now I look forward
with a new hope that I have changed.
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17. |
Compounding
03:44
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The future seems so distant
my memories reclaiming
The binds I once broke free from
return their grasp on me
Reasons why keep compounding
to leave all this for good
To surrender what is left and
give up the ground I stood
No longer do I fear what
which was my destiny
Now to lie down my causes
and forget all I've seen
Abandon who it was I
thought that I could have been
What time remains escaping
of a life I can't make sense
Where is hand to follow
to be my torch through this
If the world would allow
I'd erase all my actions
I must give up the hope for
someone to intervene
the threads wont stop fraying
until theirs none to cling
My prayers went unanswered
I'm further than you think
sunken too far to rescue
what's left of me so thin
No longer do I fear what
which was my destiny
Now to lie down my causes
and forget all I've seen
Abandon who it was I
thought that I could have been
What time remains escaping
of a life I can't make sense.
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18. |
Burn Me
04:39
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I could never ask you to do
what it is that you're thinking
in fact I know its I who must
prevent all of this from happening
So let's wipe away the tears in our eyes
so we'll remember each other with a smile
be grateful for how close we came
and lose each other in the fog of time
I spent almost every day
wanting to escape from this place
but through a crowd a hand to hold
emerged now it's so hard to go
Walking away for the both of us
Making sure you dont make a wrong turn
It pains others than us if I stay
I am the bridge that you must burn
So lets try to restrain
and put distance inbetween
these feelings we have to fear
and let the what if's drown in the years
Maybe i'll find you later in life
when our choices mean different things
I hope one day I'll find a sign
It's safe to come back into your arms reach
In a decade you will have seen
you've done well with your family
Me I'll be adrift somewhere between
alone and in your memories
this is the time where I saw love
a showing of what could be
I'll remember all that never was
A story to remind it's more than me
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Joshua Hart Huntsville, Alabama
Working in the electronically-isolated world of Huntsville, AL, an area where guitars are a prerequisite be it of the country acoustic or rock electric variety, Joshua Hart is a solo musician creating music that alienates itself from its surroundings with an unexpected combination of introspective lyrics paired with the detached sound of his trusty vocoder, backed by fragile piano melodies. ... more
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